Slime molds are gigantic, single-celled organisms. Gigantic for single celled organisms that is, most of them would easily fit on a dinner plate. Reportedly they are not good to eat though (I get asked that). They are really good at things like finding the shortest path through a labyrinth and even have a form of memory, all of that without having a brain or nervous system. It is not a stretch at all to think that such amazing organisms should be capable of language, and in fact I found a way to communicate with slime molds using modified Ouija technology. I now perform clerical duties for a slime mold named Andi.
Slime mold Andi lives in the Netherlands, in a small glass house. It likes to connect with you and you can ask it questions! The floor of its living space is filled with letters cast in porridge. As it crawls from dot to dot, it spells messages. Your questions are read out to it, and Andi answers. As Andi is a very advanced organism, it is not always clear what it tries to tell you. We depend therefore on you to explain its utterances which are often very poetic and deep, but which occasionally can also be very down to earth and practical. Your question, Andi’s answer, and your explanation of this answer will be posted here on Andi’s Medium channel.
